Saving Your Relationship After an AffairThis article will be divided into two parts. The first part is if you are the one who was cheated on, and the second part is if you are the one who cheated. In either even, saving your relationship after an affair requires honesty by both parties and that can be extremely difficult.
Saving your relationship after you cheatedIf you're the one who cheated and you want to save your relationship then your first step is to confess what you've done. There's nothing worse for a relationship than the breech of trust that happens when one partner is maneuvering around behind the other's back and making up elaborate lies as to their whereabouts. Forget everything you've heard about it being easier for the other person to not know, or confession only making you feel better. That's nonsense. What's true is that they will not feel good about your confession, and you will not feel good about confessing, but it's still the right thing to do. Firstly, it gives your partner options as to how they want to handle it. It will be a major test for the relationship, but if you truly love each other and are truly right for one another, the relationship will survive because the truth that forms the backbone of every relationship will have not been breached. Once trust is breached like that i cannot ever be fully restored. Partners move on after affairs all the time, but moving on after an affair is impossible if the relationship itself is built on lies. And that's basically what happens to relationships when affairs are involved. The cheater is so worried about their marriage or relationship failing that they figure what the other spouse doesn't know won't hurt them. When they find out in some other way, they realize that the relationship itself is built on a lie. So everything you've heard about confession really being for making you feel better is complete bunk and should be dismissed as bunk. Relationships are built on trust and once that trust is violated then it's goodbye relationship.
Saving your relationship after they cheatedIf you're the one who has been cheated on then you need to consider why the other partner cheated. Empathizing with someone who hurt you like that is going to be difficult and you need to be honest with yourself about a couple of things. Firstly, what are your motivations for forgiving the cheater? Is it because you're afraid to lose the relationship or don't think you can handle being without them? If that's the case you need to work on yourself because any relationship you get in will be a doormat style relationship, and this is not good for you. If on the other hand you feel like the person you're with is your true love and you really don't consider the infidelity to be a deal breaker then you can move on so long as they didn't treat you like a fool and lie to your face about it. Most times when people cheat in relationships they feel guilty about it afterwards. People do screw up and make bad decisions in the heat of the moment, but without addressing why those bad decisions happened in the first place, you can't ever be sure it won't happen again.
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